February 19, 2009

• Business Cards and Babies

  So yesterday I had this big meeting with one of my supervisors and the local newspaper. I’d come up with an idea that could help the community to be more aware of crime occurring in their area: a weekly crime map. Does that person over there look suspicious? Perhaps you should call it in- there has been a rash of vehicle burglaries in your area according to the weekly crime map. I already provide this information  to the officers on a weekly basis. So I thought we could give a (watered down) version to the public.
  It seems these days that everyone wants the government to take care of them without wanting to take any personal responsibility. (sound familiar? Like federal government? ) So now, people have no excuse for being unaware of their surroundings. With our new programs that I’m developing,  we have a broader way of helping the public protect themselves. Sounds boring right? Not to me. My officemate thinks I’m the biggest justice nerd he’s ever met. (I didn’t tell him I wanted to be  Batman when I grew up. It would give away my secret identity.)
  Anyhow, my point to this story is, my supervisor was so impressed with my performance for the newspaper monkeys that he told me he’d start challenging me with bigger projects, more directly related to city council… and I get my own BUSINESS CARD!!!!!
  MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
  These aren’t cheapo-imitation crab meat cards that you print off your desktop with card stock. Heck no. These are being offered through a real company. They’ll have my name with “Crime Analyst” emblazened underneath.
  How cool am I? Well.. not very… but you can’t tell that from my BUSINESS CARD!
   Stupid to get excited about, I know. But I’ve only been back with the police department for three months and it feels like I’m making progress. It’s a great feeling to be at a job you love and know they kinda like you back.

  Meanwhile, the baby and I had a dr’s appointment today. She’s still in there. The doc felt confident enough to make an appointment for next week. He said he was sure he’d be seeing me. So no baby yet. That’s fine. It’s rodeo weekend and I’m going to the fairgrounds to get me a funnel cake and a jumbo turkey leg. Maybe I can even convince the kids to go on a pony ride or something. Am I too pregnant to ride the mechanical bull?
   

  

  Congratulations — your baby is full term! This means that if your baby arrives now, her lungs should be fully mature and ready to adjust to life outside the womb, even though your due date is still three weeks away.
  
  Your baby weighs close to 7 pounds and measures a bit over 19 inches, head to heel (like a stalk of Swiss chard). Many babies have a full head of hair at birth, with locks from 1/2 inch to 1 1/2 inches long. But don’t be surprised if your baby’s hair isn’t the same color as yours. Dark-haired couples are sometimes thrown for a loop when their children come out as blonds or redheads, and fair-haired couples have been surprised by Elvis look-alikes. And then, of course, some babies sport only peach fuzz.

  PS, want a good read? Check out the ever clever, conservative friendly Sword and Sacrifice’s site.

  • 10:21 pm
  • 3 Comments