I’m so irritated right now, so sit down and shut up.

   I’m a praying woman. I’m a friggin Catholic and I don’t care what nasty  stereotypes you associate me with. I cling to my family, my morals, my guns, my Bible, my faith and my good friends. I don’t care that you’re stupid enough to disagree with my way of living. I’ll respect yours enough not to call you a moron to your face. (although you can be sure at some point, I’ve thought it.) I know who I am, ad I shine at it.

    I think recycling and alternative energy are a great thing to teach our children and practice in our daily lives. I support fair trade and organic products and don’t care if I get called  a “greenie beanie”. I’m proud of the mother I am, the daughter I am, the sister I am, the friend that I am. I know who I am and I’m glad to be me. 

   When you try and insult me by saying things you think are hurtful, it’s okay. I know who I am. I’m proud of who I am. You insult me because you’re too small minded to be comfortable and know who you are. I know who I am and I’m proud of it.

 If you don’t like the things I say, don’t read my blog. I don’t care if you disagree with me, but you don’t have to be rude when you do so. It just tells me that your anger replaces the knowledge you wish you had on the subject you’re debating. I know who I am and I’m smart as hell.

 These are all the things I am.

Confuse me with other ideas, people, views, whatever. But your judgment of me does not affect who I am.  My judgment lies in the hands of one person and  His opinion is the only one that matters.  DEAL!
(if this blog seems out of place for you, then it wasn’t aimed at you.)

YAY! I haven’t had morning sickness for a whole week. For those of you single  folks, that’s like having three months of drunken hangover days and finally getting sober. Except I don’t get to drink beer. All of the punishment with none of the prize.

 My typos will henceforth increase since my son saw it necessary to pluck several of the keys from my keyboard.  (My “N” key was particularly victimized.) Now they don’t always post when I strike them.  So enjoy alot of this: “The  rai  i  Spai  sta s  mai ly  i  the  plai .”  It’s like an NSA encryption. Or a “-SA” encryption.

 I’m also going to post a “BOOYAH!” picture for all of you family and friends who said I was pooching out my belly on purpose the other day. I’ve popped and now I’m a chubby.  I still haven’t gained any weight yet so hooray for not being a fatty. (If you were with me for the last two  pregnancies, you know I gained triple the weight I should have. I was a FATTY.)

This week, they’re not calling my baby a fruit. NOPE!  This weekend… it’s a… shellfish? Yeah. Our baby is the size of a medium shrimp? Why not just say the size of a tennis ball? Why food? Is it because I’m pregnant? You bigots.  We’re still nameless on the child. Derek’s been booted from the naming committee. (So have Michy and Tio because you only pick names from the Hun period.) So I’m picking the name for the baby by myself. I’ll give 1000 credits to anyone who submits an idea that I put on my top three list.  If you submit names like Pilot Inspector, you are disqualified. (Avenuetotherealsbiggestfan this means you.)

Fingerprints have formed on your
baby’s tiny fingertips, her veins and organs are clearly
visible through her still-thin skin, and her body is starting
to catch up with her head — which makes up just a third of her
body size now. If you’re having a girl, she now has more than
2 million eggs in her ovaries. Your baby is almost 3 inches
long (the size of a medium
shrimp) and weighs nearly an ounce. As you start your
second trimester, most of your baby’s critical development
will be completed and your odds
of miscarriage drop considerably.

As you’re probably all aware by now, McCain’s VP choice is Alaska’s governor, Sarah Palin. (unless you came straight to my site for your latest and most exciting news… in which case you might need mental help.)

As some of you know, I was at the rally where he made the announcement.

First, let me start by saying, if you go to a  Democratic rally and shout  ugly comments, the  people there will give you dirty looks and yell things at you.  But at a Republican party rally, you’ll get punched in the face.  As Senator McCain came onto the stage to make his announcement, some idiot started yelling obscenities at him, saying something about “go back to Hanoi.” (which just tells me he’s the lowest schmuck on the planet.) At first, people were throwing garbage at the man, but as the man persisted, he had to be escorted out by the men in dark suits because several large men in the crowd were heading over to him, shouting something about “Shut you up with my fist!” Once the man was removed, the whole crowd cheered and McCain (who was trying to remain polite and professional) gave a little smirk. 

 Outside the rally, there was a large group of protestors shouting rudeness with the most ignorant banners I’ve ever seen.  So I embarrassed my husband by shouting, “Go home you friggin liberal hippies!”   To which the crowd around us laughed and jeered at the protestors. I don’t believe Derek will go to anymore rallies with me. You see, my voice is sore from yelling  so long and loud at the rally and Derek is embarrassed easily.  I’m told my voice carries well. Derek’ s face was red and his shirt was white and blue.  How patriotic.

 Meanwhile, my opinion on McCain’s running mate is :HOORAH! If you don’t know much about Mrs. Palin:

-She’s been governor of the US’s largest state, Alaska, for nearly a year and city mayor of Juno for several years.   (So right off the bat, she’s already got more experience as a VP than the Dem’s choice for president.)

-She’s a mother of five children and extremely pro-life. 

-Her eldest son is currently heading to Iraq to serve his first deployment.

-She’s cut Alaska’s state debt by over a BILLION dollars.

-She’s an enemy of what she calls “Good Ol’ Boy” politics and has proven it by the maverick way she’s run her state. There’s a saying: “The fields of Alaska are littered with the bodies of those who crossed Sarah Palin.”

-Her nickname is Sarah “Barracuda” and for good reason. When she sees a business injustice, a social injustice or any other sort of wrong-doing, she gets after the person causing the problem and shuts them down.

Growing up in a small town, she’s always stood up for what’s right.  I realize that unless something happens to the President, a VP doesn’t have much of a job, but regardless of what her position may be- she’ll do a fantastic job.

Not only that, McCain- you clever dog.

When people said you were too old, you picked a VP who is very young.

When people said you were too liberal for the conservative republican ticket, you picked a VP that  was in NO WAY liberal in any measure. I’m feeling more and more republican everyday. Until now, I was eyeballing the Libertarian party.

When people were upset that they couldn’t get a woman (Hillary) into the White House, you fixed it to make history: the first woman vice president.

A well played chess move, Mr. McCain. Well played. I think both McCain and Palin have one heck of a journey ahead of them, however, they’re both famous for not backing down.

 The dems are already releasing statements about how little  experience Sarah P has… but she’s already got more than double the experience of the Democratic candidate.  They need to toe the line here. When their candidate decides he wants to play nice and “talk”  with the terrorists who bomb our cities, our candidate and his Veep will already be blowing the asses off the terrorists. Negotiations… bah.

By the way, I was so psyched to get so close to the stage.. I was going to record McCain’s announcement as he said it and post it here for you guys. But as he was just about to say Sarah’s name, my battery died. So enjoy the fifteen seconds of McCain  *before* he said his VP’s name.

“How much is that doggie in the window?”

“It’s broken.”

“Can I get a discount on it?”

“Sure.”

Yeah, I broke my dog.  She was on the couch so I did what I’ve done a hundred times before: I pushed her off and said, “Get down.”

Simple enough, right?

Cept, she landed wrong on her little puppy paw and sprained her tiny puppy ankle.  I sprained my dog’s ankle. I think that means I’m going to hell. She immediately started screaming and yelping. All of our windows were open so the WHOLE neighborhood came out to see who was killing a dog.  Just me.

Today, she’s putting a little bit of pressure on it but sometimes forgets  she’s got an injury. So she goes running down the back steps to go play outside.  Then stands at the bottom of the steps screaming for five solid minutes. Everyone looks out their windows to see who’s killing the dog. Just me again.

One of my neighbors asked me if she’d been hit by a car while she was outside.

“No. I just pushed her off the couch. I’m going to hell.”

My husband didn’t talk to me for a little over thirty minutes when it happened. That’s a long time for him. I got the cold shoulder, the evil eyes, the scowl when I passed by.

My GOSH! I didn’t do it on purpose! It doesn’t matter. I’m going to hell. Suck.

Tomorrow’s the McCain rally and announcement  of his VP. I’ll have to get there at about 9:30 in the morning even though the event doesn’t start until 11:00. Fortunately, Derek and the kids will be there with me. They’re supposed to have several celebrities and performers there to provide entertainment before the event.  Awesome. I’ll update about it tomorrow.

But then I’m going to hell because I broke my dog.

Night!

More references to fruit. I have a lime in my belly now, yet I’m unsure as to whether it’s a male or female lime.  We’ll find out in 8 weeks.  But by then, we’ll be in Texas. FIFTY more days till we’re in Texas. (that includes drive time.) As promised, here’s the new baby belly picture. I might be leaning back slightly to make the belly show more… maybe. It still looks like I’ve had too many cupcakes.(and Arby’s fries.) It’s not really a “baby” in my  belly yet.

   Cupcake belly                                                                     Lime                

                                                                                              /

                                                                                           /   

                                                                                        /

                           /                                                         /

The most dramatic development this week: Reflexes. Your baby’s fingers will soon begin to open and close, his toes will curl, his eye muscles will clench, and his mouth will make sucking movements. In fact, if you prod your abdomen, your baby will squirm in response. His intestines, which have grown so fast that they protrude into the umbilical cord, will start to move into his abdominal cavity about now, and his kidneys will begin excreting urine into his bladder. From crown to rump, your baby-to-be is just over two inches long (about the size of a lime) and weighs half an ounce.

More updates later after my exciting week comes to a close.

Do you really even know what a smorgasbord is? Geez kids, didn’t you ever watch (the old school) Charlotte’s Web?

Meeting McCain
  As most of you political nuts know, John McCain is announcing his running mate in the city we’re living in at a large rally on Friday. Guess who scored tickets? Yep. It’s me. I’m hoping he’ll have a Q&A session like I always see on TV. I doubt it, but I’d really love to hear him answer some questions put forth by the people.  I watched FOX news’ reports on the history of McCain  that was on last week. They had one on Obama too and I missed it. I keep hoping they’ll re-air it. I learned SO much about McCain and I’m really getting  excited to put my vote in his corner. I realize I still disagree with him on a few minor issues, but I’m sold on his character now. By the way, this is the most clever non-violent ad I have EVER seen in the history of ads. AWESOME.

Baby Update:
Tomorrow is the 12 week mark and I’ll post a new baby belly pic. It’s actually starting to look like I’ve eaten too many cupcakes. I’ve become increasingly convinced it’s a girl as I can’t stop eating french fries. Arby’s knows me by name since their curly fries have called me every night this week. I finally was able to eat red meat for the first time in 11 weeks. I had the biggest freakin Wendy’s baconator , all smothered in beefy, cheesy, bacony goodness. My pre-pregnancy diet is screaming like a baby inside of me.   I’ve already started ebaying cool nursery things.  Whoa. I guess the transition is complete. I’ve officially gone from “babe” to “mom”. I just used “cool” and “nursery things” in the same sentence.

51 days
Only  one month and 21 days until we’re back in Texas for good. I’ve been mapquesting different routes each night out of boredom and anxiety. Meanwhile, computer usage is sometimes limited due to all the outprocessing activities we’ve been doing. (Primarily, seeing all the sights of Dayton before we leave.)

LOL-lympics:
I’ve recommended it, but it’s not enough. Check out theblackspiderman’s latest post. Anyone who’s a fan of Lolcats knows what this is all about. http://www.xanga.com/theblackspiderman/671096934/lol-ympics.html

Fishing with a two year old:
Interesting to say the least.
 My daughter thinks if she throws enough rocks in the lake, she’s bound to hit at least one fish. 
“I’m onna cats it mommy! I’m onna cats a fiss!” 

Now anyone who’s ever fished before knows you have to remain very quiet to lure a fish close enough to your area  to catch it. Especially if you cast like a girl and can’t get your lure more than fifty feet from where you’re standing. Caity, however, has decided that calling the fish to her is  a more effective method.
She’s rather inventive, perhaps she knows what she’s talking about.
Speaking of what she’s talking about, let’s play a rousing game of “Kids Say The Darndest Things!”
Things overheard from the mouth of my girl in the last 24 hours: (I’ll translate it so you can understand her twoish accent)
 ”I’m SUPERCAITY! Just like Super Batman, Mommy!”
 ”No Daddy, it’s my belly. Don’t take it.”
 ”I’ll kick your butt.”
 ”Silly daddy, you’re  tarded.”
 ”Mommy, your name not Manda. Your name Mommy.”
 *cat growling, Caity laying on top of  said cat* “Aww! Kitty cat singing mommy!”
 ”What a b*tch.” (apparently daddy didn’t know Cait was listening when he was cursing at the democrat arguing  on TV.)
  “That silly Daddy… *sighs* I wove him.”

Yesterday was the big three years. Yes folks, I’ve lived day by day with my husband and haven’t killed him yet. Last weekend in a furniture shop, a woman stopped me and told me she and her husband  had been together for 60 years.
She sweetly said, “Compromise is half the battle.”
I smiled and said, “I suppose compromise is slightly better than strangling them.” She nodded with a devilish grin on her face.
 No offense single dudes,  but when you and your girl get married, you’re from two different lifestyles, two different upbringings. So yeah, it’s not big deal that you want to eat your dinner on the couch in front of the boob tube. (Although you’d better not be watching boobs during dinner.) She however, will probably want to eat at a special invention called a table once in awhile. Now when you get invited to eat dinner at this so-called table with her, note that she’s probably going to want to talk to you.
 *Oh crap*

You’re not in trouble. She just wants to hear about your day. This doesn’t mean you say, “It was fine.” It means all the meaningless crap that happened, (you stubbed your toe, almost bumped into Bob,  didn’t get tomato on your sandwich when you SPECIFICALLY asked for some) she’s gonna want to know all that. I know, I know, you didn’t even care enough to remember it, but she’ll appreciate you recounting the stupid details of your day. More than anything, she likes hearing your voice.
*Oh Okay*

Another thing that can get you brownie points: Remember something stupid about her day. Kevin James made reference to this on his stand up routine. 
Female: “You wanna know what I’m thinking about? Do you remember the other day at  my sister’s house? Do you remember what you did?”
You pause for a second  to add a slight dramatic flair.
Male: “At your sister’s house when you had that blue top on? And those little butterfly clips in your hair? That was pretty. “
No matter what she was going to say, you’ve instantly won. You are a king. All because you took the time to remember  a silly detail or two.
 One other desperately important thing to remember.
During her once a month time:
1. You are always wrong.
2. You will remain silent.
3. The TV will stay on whatever channel she wants it on.
4. You will not argue with ANYTHING.
Not all women experience such strong reactions during this  time period, but it’s really not worth the risk.

 These are only a few tips in a LONG line of good ideas to keep with you when you’re dating or married to someone.
Thank you, my beloved husband, for surviving three looooong years with me. Here’s to 100 more. (if you’re lucky.) I love you.

I was sitting here thinking about nothing in particular when I suddenly felt a butterfly in my stomach. Just one. A tiny little flutter.  I jerked up straight,
 ”HOLY SH*T, The baby KICKED!”

 I knew  it was coming soon, but it caught me off guard. It becomes more and more real to me and I’ve really noticed my  previously flat stomach has become increasingly pooched. I don’t blame the ice cream at all. (Does this big fat belly make me look fat?) I’ve been craving fried egg sandwiches and salsa. At 11:45pm last night, I insisted my husband make me a fried egg sandwich smothered in mustard. I sat there chowing down, completely disgusted with my choice of food. But what baby wants, baby gets. Nobody puts baby in a corner.

   On Friday night after he’d had a few drinks, my beloved husband looked at me with his bright red drunken ears and said,
“You know what honey? I’m glad we’re already having another baby. We didn’t plan it, but it’s gonna be great. We’re just getting the big family we’ve always wanted a little earlier than expected. We really are going to be okay.”

  I really hadn’t been letting my fears get  to me  lately about all of the  things that can/are going wrong in our plans for the future. But hearing him speak so honestly without any hesitance really affirmed my strength in the future.  I know we’re going to be alright. At this point, I don’t know how. But it’s going to work out. Maybe not the way we planned it,  but it will all happen.  I’ve said these words a thousand times over the past few months, but it’s nice to finally believe them.

  Our three year wedding anniversary is on Wednesday. Three years, three kids. If things continue at this rate, we might be divorced by year five and just living together in celibacy.

 By the way, our baby is no longer the size of a kumquat. =)

11 Weeks (29 to go)

Your
baby, just over 1 1/2 inches long and about the size of a
fig, is now almost fully formed. Her hands will soon open and
close into fists, tiny tooth buds are beginning to appear
under her gums, and some of her bones are beginning to harden.
She’s already busy kicking and stretching, and her tiny
movements are so effortless they look like water ballet. These
movements will become more frequent as her body grows and
becomes more developed and functional.

Next week’s update: New baby belly picture!

Alright, Xangan haters. I realize I piss you off with  my pro-life stance. That’s fine. But egging my house? Not cool.

What sucks is that my window was open, screen closed. So egg got all over both of my suede couches, my curtains, my cat, my pants. I was sitting next to the window watching the news and my cat was on the back of the couch. Chances are, some punk just wanted to see a chick and her cat jump a mile. However the chick decided to  jump off the couch and chase out the door after these creeps.  Said car of creeps drove off quickly with girl standing out the door shouting obscenities at them.  Punks. What sucks even more is that I  can’t get all the egg crap off my couch.  I thought OxiClean was my savior, but it’s no match.
   Oxi? Meet your mortal enemy : eggwhites.

I was only in college a few years ago and I don’t recall throwing eggs to be a funny ordeal. Did you? Have I really gotten that old?

Here I go. One of many more to come. Another  reason you should consider not throwing your vote away by going with Obama, but it has to be said.

 You can listen to the gibberish on the radio, listen to heresay on the  media, but this is an actual woman who saw and heard first hand how Obama wants to treat children who survive abortion. He wants them to die. First-hand information that sounds more like a story on “Ripley’s Believe it Or Not.”  It’s disgusting and incredible.

  Several years ago, Jill Stanek was working in an Illinois hospital where she found that infants who survived a partial birth abortion were left alive laying in trash cans or sterilized tables, or utility rooms, etc until they finally died. One particular instance, Jill saw a nurse taking a child to a utility room. He was a Downs Syndrome child whom the parents did not want. They aborted him at 5 and a half months, but the abortion didn’t kill him. They did not want to hold him and sent him off to die. (After all, the parents shouldn’t  have to suffer just because the doctor hadn’t successfully murdered the child.) The nurse carrying the child told Jill she didn’t have time to handle him. Jill took him and held the baby, comforting him until he died, a short 45 minutes later. Needless to say, this event turned Jill’s life around.

   By 2003, Jill  had become so involved in the pro-life community that she was asked to testify in front of the Illinois state committee who would approve or  disapprove a bill known as BAIPA. (Born Alive Infant Protection Act) This bill  simply states any child born alive after a botched abortion was a legal citizen with American  and human rights, deserving of medical attention. Obama was part of that committee. Not only did he vote against it, but actually stood up and argued against her, saying he was afraid the passing of this bill would overturn the Roe V Wade ruling.  However, an almost identical version of this bill was passed on a federal  level and it did not overturn Roe V Wade.   (the BAIPA bill was later passed in IL in 2005 after Obama left)

Hey Obama, Jesus called and wanted me to tell you something-
  “It would be better to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone
tied around the neck than to face the punishment in store for harming
one of these little ones.”

-Jesus  (Luke 17)

NOW:  I’m furious that one of the men on McCain’s possible Vice President list is a pro-choicer. Granted, he’s not as bad as Barack Infanticide Obama, but I stand with the bulk of the pro-life community when I feel violated by handing my vote to McCain and his possible pro-choice VP.  I actually got to speak to the infamous Sean Hannity on his radio show this afternoon so I’ll pretend my voice has some clout.

“Dear John McCain,
BAD CHOICE. Stay conservative. Quit fooling yourself by claiming to be a Reagan conservative. You’re a liberal Republican who needs to get BACK to your conservative roots.  We’re not voting for you because we’re blinded by your false conservative appeal. We’re voting for you to keep Baby-killer Obama out of the Oval Office.”

 I just got an email a few days before this little tidbit of gossip hit the air. It was from “Christians for McCain.” I wonder if he makes that decision, just how many will still be for him? I’ve gone rounds with my husband over just how influential a VP is/isn’t, but does it violate the principal of the matter?

  “If I wanted to kill infants, but leave all the death row-murdersome  inmates alive to mooch off my tax dollars, I’d vote Democrat.”
- Life_By_Us

For those of you who are visual learners, here’s a sum up video, via CNN: